A few days ago I wrote about a jezebel article about the rising popularity of butt sex – the subtheme of the article wa sthat now gorls were being expected to have anal sex too much by overeager guys, and that annal fissures were the resulting increasing trend…
The controversy over fifth base
Well, scallywag and vagabond did a followup article to that piece, entitled, amusingly enough:
Anal sex. How it suddenly became the grim reaper that women are now forced to exact at the mercy of leery men.
A good read, click the link, you'll enjoy it I think. Not long, not sophisticated, the counterarguments and true enough but a bit weak and definitely unsupported. But go ahead, read it, it's part of anal culture now.
And the author left out something very important, which I will mention after the snippet.
Here's some snippets:
Really? Men are wishing to perform anal sex to subjugate a woman? To make her unhappy? To assert their own power? If this were the case I would dare think that instead of a general trend of more anal sex in society it would be the other way round- less anal sex as women realized it was both uncomfortable and demeaning to them. But the trends suggest otherwise, rather it suggests that men and women are more open to such affairs and that we only proceed with them because we are consenting adults who ultimately wish to please our partners as much as we aim to please ourselves.
I think his talk of mutual pleasure seeking and a new culture of sexual exploration is accurate enough, as far as it goes.
But, anal sex does have elements of domination and subjugation in it. Thats what makes it hot.
Here's the part that gets left out – for the people that like it, anal sex is the most incredibly bonding of sex acts that a couple is likely to experience. Even a bad anal experience can be immensely bonding. Frankly it never fails to make me feel incredibly close to a woman, to feel more trust in her, to feel that mushy in love feeling EVEN IF I"VE BEEN WITH HER FOR YEARS.
This is one of teh secrets of anal sex – it makes the man a fucking mushball of love and oxytocin bonding afterwards. It;s not JUST about domination, it's about the feelings of intimacy and yes, love, that come after the shared experience of domination and subjugation, the shared experience of anal sex and anal contact.
Now, this is probably not true for all people – you know, the old theories of tit men and ass men and oral or anal fixations, maybe theres soem truth to it, and for another emotional-sexual "type" anal sex wouldn't trigger that intense bonding. That's something for future sex researcher sto discover.
But – we are discussing anal sex at all right now because it's still the taboo hole – our society is obsessed with anal sex and forbidding anal sex – meaning that perhaps anal is the taboo that triggers bonding for a lot of folks – and fear of pleasure and inappropriate bonding in others.
Girls, something to think about – he wants you asshole in hopes of having something special with you, at the very least, of having a memory that never fades.
