Well, let me tell ya, unless your wife already likes inhalants, I can’t recommend using them, especially for a first time experience. Inhalants like Rush have been popular in the gay community for anal sex, and they do have their place in advanced sex play, but they have drawbacks too, not the least of which is their short length of effect, somewhat overwhelming ‘rush’, strong odor, and possible legal complications if something goes wrong.

Definitely for advanced play only, with a partner who is experienced in using them.

There is really one absolutely best choice of a relaxing drug to make anal sex easier, especially first time anal sex, and that is good old fashioned alcohol. Not too much alcohol either, just a little bit drunk is perfect. The actual amount would depend on how much your wife is experienced with alcohol - if she is already a skilled drinker, let her pick the amount to drink. If she isn’t, I suggest about one and a half drinks to two drinks. A four ounce glass of wine, followed by another half a glass, should produce almost exactly the right amount of playful relaxation.

A little more probably wouldn’t hurt, and I have known some women who like to be a little smashed for anal sex, like 4 drinks + drunk. Alcohol does work well, it’s legal, commonly available, socially acceptable, and it’s likely to leave your partner with fun memories with no overtones of being pressured into anal, which is definitely something you want to avoid if you want your partner to look forward to future anal sessions.